Beers Eye Drunk

A few weeks ago I had the worst ROI of any beer analysis conducted to date. I bought somewhere around $18 worth of beer, including the modestly priced Sam Adam's Summer Ale, on sale for $5.50 a six-pack. Through a series unfortunate events, I found myself drinking the beer rather quickly, taking little note of it at all.

I watched Germany get eliminated from the World Cup and most of the beers disappeared through the course of the game. I remember nothing about the beer or the game. I don't remember hating either. In retrospect, I could have been more present for both.... This is why I don't get very much out of life. I drift off, ignore details, and flop through life moment by moment with no real drive or interest in anything...

So, I bought six more of these Summer Ales thinking that perhaps the beer was so good and smooth I simply drank them too fast to recall them... Well, somewhere in this week's blur of job applications, interviews, and cover letters, five more of these beers got knocked down without so much as a scribbled post-it left behind. And the saddest part, for me and the beer, I don't really remember what the hell this stuff tastes like and can't even begin to describe it. And so there is now just one left, and it falls to the destructive power of video and the restorative magic of video editing to bring artistic merit back to the blog.

In the meantime, I have been craving a beer so bad I even drank four Lone Stars, which is the taste equivelent of flossing with a wet mules' ass hair. But still, I've been too lazy to set up the video camera and there are several lighting issues that I can't quite resolve. Mainly, I'm too lazy to put a new bulb in the living room.

Are we catching the general theme here?

I'm too lazy.... too lazy for the craft of studious beer drinking... instead, I'm a guy without a job, who invests large sums of his shrinking finances on beer, not because he cares enough about beer to even remember how it tastes... Nope. I am a man who drinks for no particular reason, every day I can.

It's really no wonder things didn't work out with me and work... When even beer is too much work, then you've got a serious problem. At least problem drinkers are aiming to get fucked up. I think the only reason I'm not is because it takes too long... I hope to have the second video beer blog up before Friday, anyhow... but I really wouldn't bet on me at this point.